God wanted me to live in a house with no stairs & he told me why on Easter Sunday.
I moved to Tampa Bay from Long Island, NY 16 years ago. I was completely fascinated at the amount of ranch homes here in the sunshine state & couldn’t wait to live in one. Considering how much cheaper it is to live in FL vs NY I was able to purchase one with a little luck of the Irish (an Irish man owned it) and some help from a previous friend. I loved my house and adored my time alone in this wide open space. (insert the song “Wide Open Spaces” here). It was a real time to fight the battle of being lonely versus being alone. It was also a pivotal time of healing for me as there was no place to go but through some of the pain I had endured in my 2nd phase of sobriety. I got to know myself pretty well during this time….what resembled loneliness was dressed up as a spiritual breakthrough. I couldn’t afford furniture but I was 10 years sober and it was a huge step up from homeless.
Today, I am happily married to a man that lived around the corner from this house I sold with some more luck of the Irish. The woman branded as “The Irish Realtor”, Deb Ward, actually sold the house so I’m not exaggerating about the luck of the Irish here either. I purposely said previous friend in the last paragraph because that was another phase of this spiritual awakening. Not sure why anyone would ever think a spiritual journey looks peaceful, it kicked my ass right into a reality I avoided examining for many years.
Fast forward to today, Easter Sunday like no other in history. We are all living through a temporary new normal & enduring a global pandemic together. I woke up at 5:30am and took our beautiful chocolate lab, Charlie Brown outside. The moon was so bright and the air was so crisp. We don’t have many ‘dry’ mornings with cool breezes here in FL so it was a noticeable shift. I looked up at the moon, stretched my arms and as clear as day I heard the latest whisper as I turned to look at our house. “I always wanted you to live in a house with no stairs.” The tears began to flow over this tremendous smile on my face….I knew exactly what He meant.
In my darkest days as a young adult I practiced throwing myself down the basement stairs. I suffered terribly from depression every time I tried to get sober from age 18–21. Practicing where you want to die is an image that never leaves you. That was over 25 years ago and I made a promise to never forget Him for sparing my life and saving my family from devastation.
Who knew what He had in store for me. I was reassured again this morning that a higher source is in charge. I heard your whisper loud and clear God and I promise to never take your grace for granted. You. Are. Not. Alone.
